Really funny jokes galore with a new hilarious joke of the day, every day! http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/ A murderer, sitting in the electric chair, was about to be executed. "Have you any last requests? asked the chaplain. "Yes," replied t... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/last-request/1634/ Q: Where did the blonde tell her other blonde friend to meet her? A: At the corner of Walk and Don't Walk.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blondes-meeting/902/ Q: What did the ice cream say to the unhappy cake? A: "Hey, what's eating you?"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/unhappy-cake/344/ Barty and Dunny met in a pub and discussed the illness of a friend named Hogan. "Poor Micheal Hogan! Faith, I'm afraid he's goin' to die... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/poor-micheal-hogan/2871/ A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order. There was a big sign posted. "No bills larger... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/bill/1748/ Yo Mama so fat, she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for their new world!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/spain-claim-yo-mama/383/ A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender asks the seal, "What's your pleasure?" The seal replies, "An... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/seals-pleasure/1151/ A blonde and her girlfriend went to the beach for the day. As they wandered up and down the shoreline in their bikinis the girlfriend bega... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-at-the-beach/662/ Two men were sitting in a pub and getting pretty drunk. Out of the corner of the first man's eye, he sees a beautiful young woman. "I'd l... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dance-with-me/3254/ Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Write 'Flip over' on both sides of a piece of cardboard and give it to her.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/how-do-you-confuse-a-blonde/860/ Q. What did the maggot say to another? A. What's a nice maggot like you doing in a joint like this!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/talking-maggots/2415/ A patient has a sore throat and goes to a doctor to get treatment for it. Doctor: "Your tonsils gotta come out." Patient: "I wanna sec... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/i-would-like-to-havea-second-opinion/1276/ A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room, she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/green-side-up/1224/ Knock knock! Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim mind if I come in.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/jim/3243/ A blonde goes to a doctor and tells that both his ears are burnt. "Sit down and tell me how it happened," said the doctor. "Well, I wa... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/burnt-ears/778/ Q. What do you call a chicken that crosses the road rolls in dirt and comes back? A. A dirty double crosser!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-dirty-chicken/3193/ Q: Why did God give blondes one more brain cell than horses? A: So they don't poop in the parade.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blondes-and-horses/687/ At fifty you've accumulated the knowledge and wisdom of half a century. This would be a tremendous asset if only darned senility hadn't wipe... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/at-fifty/347/ During the Super Bowl, there was another football game of note between the big animals and the little animals. The big animals were crushing... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-other-super-bowl/4752/ Knock knock! Who's there? I eat mop! I eat mop who? Oh that's nasty!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/i-eat-mop/3187/ Q: What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A: A flat minor.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/piano-down-a-mine-shaft/2487/ A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, "Please be gentle, I'm sti... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/im-still-a-virgin/169/ Q. What's pretty, delicate and carries a sub machine gun? A. A killer butterfly!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/armed-and-dangerous/2286/ Four farmers were seated at the bar in a tavern. At the table next to them sat a young girl. The first man said, "I think it's WOOMB." Th... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/four-farmers/5327/ Q: What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? A: They drowned in Spring Training.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-ice-hockey-team/5227/ First soldier: "Pass me the chocolate pudding, would you?" Second soldier: "No way, Jose!" First soldier: "Why ever not?" Second so... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/chocolate-pudding/1501/ Two Irish friends greeted each other while waiting their turn at the bank window. "This reminds me of Finnegan," remarked one. "What abo... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-about-finnegan/2913/ A blonde wanted to go to the shopping mall, but she missed the number 22 bus. Not wanting to lose time at the mall, she decided to take th... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-misses-the-bus/821/ "You are a cheat!" shouted the attorney to his opponent. "And you're a liar!" bellowed the opposition. Banging his gavel loudly, the j... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-attorneys/4511/ Sheri, the pert and pretty nurse took her troubles to a resident psychiatrist in the hospital where she worked. "Doctor, you must help me... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/sheri/1416/ A man takes his wife to the cattle show. They start heading down the alley that houses all the bulls. The sign on the first bull's stall sta... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-cattle-show/3394/ A young couple had been married for a couple of weeks, and the man was always after his wife to quit smoking. One afternoon, she lit up a... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/stop-smoking/5133/ A couple of blonde men in a pick-up truck drove into a lumber yard. One of the blonde men walked in the office and said, "We need some ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blondes-at-a-lumber-yard/680/ Two men walk into a bar... you would of thought one of them would have seen it!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/two-men/3303/ Q. What is a myth? A. A female moth!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/myth-question/2281/ Q. What's the difference between a drunk and a pothead? A. A drunk speeds right through a stop sign. A pothead waits for it to turn green... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/difference-between-a-drunk-and-a-pothead/5336/ Q: Why did the blonde snort NutraSweet? A: She thought it was Diet Coke!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/snorting-blonde/738/ A blonde and a brunette are at a top of a really high mountain. They are both told to bungee jump to the bottom of mountain, but who gets to... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-bungee-jump/5372/ A husband suspects his wife is having an affair. He needs to go on a business trip for several days, so he decides to set a trap for her. He... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-wife-trap/5140/ Q. What happened when the chef found a daddy long legs in the salad? A. It became a daddy short legs!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-chef-and-the-daddy-long-legs/2398/ The Harry Potter series is a bit surreal don't you think? I mean I believe all the magic and flying broomsticks and all but come on, when do... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-ginger-kid/5373/ A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. "You'll get your chanc... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/-burglar-talk/1037/ Q. What reads and lives in an apple? A. A bookworm!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-reads-and-lives-in-an-apple/2412/ Q. Did you hear about the blonde coyote? A. It got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/trapped-blonde-coyote/805/ Three old men are sitting on the porch of a retirement home. The first says, "Fellas, I got real problems. I'm seventy years old. Every morn... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/three-old-men/2670/ Q. What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak? A. Morse toad!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/toad-joke/2367/ Three vampires walk into a bar and sit down at a table. The waitress comes over and asks the first vampire what he would like. The first vam... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/three-vampires-walk-into-a-bar/1156/ Yo Mama so fat she had to iron her clothes in the driveway!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-ironing/5339/ Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool. "You're not allowed to pee in the pool," said the lifeguard. "I... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/everyone-pees-in-the-pool/4663/ A reported newspaper headline went as follows... "A hole has appeared in the ladies changing rooms at the sports club. Police are looking... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/newspaper-headline/1675/ Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Give her a packet of M&M's and tell her to put them in alphabetical order!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/confusing-a-blonde/732/ This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professiona... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/unprofessional-doctor/156/ This is a genuine text sent accidentally to a landline telephone. Hello, I've got a bone to pick with you. You are hanky got, stuck on a ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/bizarre-text/5371/ A farmer named Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside except for a pet dog he had for a long time. The dog finally died and Muldoon... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dog-service/3065/ Yo Mama so nasty she brings crabs to the beach!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-goes-to-the-beach/3136/ Q. What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective? A. Santa Clues!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/father-christmas-pi/2823/ A beautiful innocent young woman wants to meet Santa Claus, so she puts on a robe and stays up late on Christmas Eve. Santa arrives, climbs ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/santas-gotta-go/3728/ Yo Mama so old she sat behind Jesus in class!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-and-jesus/3329/ Q: Why did the blonde take 16 friends to the movies? A: Because the sign said under 17 not admitted.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-at-the-movies/656/ The world is divided into two groups. There are those who know, and those who don't know. Those who know are no problem. Those who don't ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/in-the-know/1433/ Q. What did the snail say when he was riding the turtle? A. Weeeeeeeeeeeee!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/ride-the-turtle/3154/ Some people ask the secret of Anthony's long marriage. They take time to go to a restaurant two times a week: a little candlelight dinner... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/secret-of-a-long-marriage/2577/ A blonde went to her mail box several times way before it was time for the mailman to make his rounds. A neighbour noticed her repeated... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/a-blonde-and-her-mail-box/610/ An elderly widow and widower were dating for about five years. The man finally decided to ask her to marry. She immediately said, "Yes." ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-was-the-answer/2675/ Little Pete came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing. It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/bad-fight/119/ A blonde's apartment was on fire, so she called 911. Operator: "911, what is your emergency?" Blonde: "My apartment is on fire!" O... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blondes-apartment-on-fire/611/ A little boy went up to his grandfather and asked, "Grandpa, can you make a sound like a frog?" When the grandfather asked why, the boy repl... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/can-you-make-a-sound-like-a-frog/125/ Two hunters went moose hunting every winter without success. Finally, they came up with a foolproof plan. They got a very authentic female m... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/moose-hunting/3866/ Yo Momma so fat that she ran into a bus and thought it was a twinky!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-momma-and-the-twinky/3364/ During a readiness exercise, my friend Jim and I, Air Force security policemen, were guarding entry to a bunker-like structure where aircraf... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/no-id/1526/ A blonde reports for her university final exam which consists of mainly true and false questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-answers/1213/ Q. What did the people call Batman and Robin after the monster crushed them? A. Flatman and Ribbon!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/batman-and-robin-vs-monster/3265/ Q. What do men and lino have in common? A. If you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them the rest of your life!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-do-men-and-lino-have-in-common/85/ Q. What do you call a nut that has had too much to drink? A. Pistachio!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/drunken-nut/5369/ Q. What is red and dangerous? A. Strawberry and tarantula jelly!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-is-red-and-dangerous/2407/ A couple of old guys were golfing when one said he was going to Dr. Taylor for a new set of dentures in the morning. His friend remarked ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/doctor-taylor/2119/ Q. What does a clock say to the other when it's mad? A. You know what really ticks me off!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/mad-clock/3170/ Two prisoners were making their escape over the jailhouse roof when one of them dislodged a tile. "Who's there?" shouted a guard. The first ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-not-so-great-escape/238/ A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's artwo... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/drawing-god/142/ Q. What is a pirates favourite letter of the alphabet? A. Rrrrrrrrrrrr!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/pirates-favourite-letter/5368/ Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and s... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/moaning-mary/1029/ Q: Why do blondes have triangular coffins? A: Every time their head hits the pillow their legs spread.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/triangular-coffins/790/ I stopped at a friend's house the other day and found him stalking around with a flyswatter. When I asked if he had gotten any flies, he ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/difference-between-male-and-female-flies/3482/ This is apparently a true story... Four teenagers were arrested in the parking lot of a large mall in Lakeland, Fla., just before Christm... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/grand-stupid-auto-theft/2020/ A depressed young woman was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the dock... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-stowaway/181/ Daffy the blonde duck was a bit behind schedule. Winter had arrived already and she was just heading south. As she was flying above a smal... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-duck/827/ Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep? A: A stripy sweater!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/cross-a-tiger-with-a-sheep/2192/ Steven Spielberg was busy discussing his new action adventure about famous classical composers. Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/classical-composers/233/ Q. How do you know a blond is having a bad day? A. Her tampon is stuck behind her ear and she can't find her cigarette.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blond-having-a-bad-day/751/ Nancy and Betty, and Jim and Tom were in the old people's home. Nancy and Betty thought Jim and Tom weren't getting enough excitement so... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/naughty-nancy-and-betty/3295/ Q: Why do dogs bury bones in the ground? A: Because you can't bury them in trees!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dogs-burying-bones/2207/ Q: Why are harps like elderly parents? A: Both are unforgiving and hard to get into and out of cars.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/harps-like-elderly-parents/2483/ The Baltimore Police Department, famous for it's superior K-9 unit, was somewhat taken back by a recent incident. Returning home from w... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/burglarized-blonde/866/ I could have been yo daddy, but the gorilla in front of me in line didn't use a condom.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-and-the-gorilla/392/ Two fishermen were out on the lake when one of them dropped his wallet. As they watched the wallet float down to the depths of the lake, a c... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/thieving-carp/1592/ Q. Why do Blondes like tilt steering? A. Because there's more head room.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blondes-and-tilt-steering/885/ Q. If there are five flies in the kitchen, how do you know which one is the American Football player? A. The one in the sugar bowl!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/flies-in-the-kitchen/2248/ A young man is walking down a stranded country lane when he realises he needs to go to the toilet. The only thing he can pee in is a empty c... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/walking-home/3130/ Q: What do you call an eternity? A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/eternity/4026/ Yo Mama so fat, not even Usain Bolt can run around her!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/usain-bolt/5367/ Patient: "Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pack of cards!" Doctor: "I'll deal with you later!"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/doctor-doctor/3223/ The blonde was broke and desperate. She knocked on the door of a doctor's house and said she needed money and would be willing to work for... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/porch-painter/593/ A city slicker moves to the country and decides he's going to take up farming. He heads to the local co-op and tells the man, "Give me a ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/baby-chickens/460/ There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/everything-is-big-in-texas/5242/ Q. Why doesn't the Queen invite footballers around for tea? A. Because they are always dribbling!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-queen-and-footballers/3129/ Yo Mama so fat that she's the same height even when she's laying down!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-laying-down/5366/ Q. Why do blondes drive BMWs? A. Because they can spell it!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-drives/853/ Polceman: "I'm afraid that I'm going to have to lock you up for the night." Man: "What's the charge?" Polceman: "Oh, there's no charge... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/whats-the-charge/1712/ Q. How do you know that a blonde was on your computer? A. You see Tipp-Ex on your monitor's screen!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-used-you-computer/698/ Patient: "Doctor, if I give up wine, women, and song, will I live longer?" Doctor: "Not really. It will just seem longer."... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/doctor-if-i-give-up/1246/ Q. Why does a Blonde leave the bathroom door open? A. So nobody can look through the keyhole!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-in-the-bathroom/1070/ A cowboy and a biker are on death row, and are to be executed on the same day. The day comes, and they are brought to the gas chamber. The w... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/last-request/2516/ Q. Why did the chicken cross over to the park? A. To get to the other slide!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/chicken/5365/ Q: What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A: Last year's hide and go seek winner!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dead-blonde/626/ Two Americans were walking up the street when they saw somebody who was obviously Canadian. Upon seeing this, they decide to go and make fun... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/two-americans-and-a-canadian/1077/ It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/all-the-kids-are-doing-it/5137/ A guy gets to have a chance of a life time. He gets to see his guardian angel. So the guy is really amazed. "Can you do any really cool ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/cool-miracles/753/ This woman dies and goes to heaven. While waiting in line, she hears this terrible screaming and moaning. This disturbs her somewhat, so she... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/are-you-sure-you-want-to-go-there/4749/ One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had severa... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/white-hair/130/ A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you a... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/hey-lady/3083/ There were three strings and they were assigned to go and attempt to get a drink from a bar. So the first 1st string went and come to no ava... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/three-strings/3383/ Q: How can you tell if a blonde is a good cook? A: She gets the pop tart out of the toaster in one piece!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/good-cook/766/ A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who was a big bu... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/change-your-attitude/4421/ Q. What goes eek, eek, bang? A. A mouse in a minefield!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/eek-eek-bang/2292/ A little boy returned from the grocery store with his Mom. While his Mom put away the groceries, the little boy opened his box of animal cra... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/animal-crackers/449/ Q: What is dumber than two guys building a bridge in the desert? A: Two blondes trying to fish off it.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/bridge-in-the-desert/746/ A blonde was sitting in a barber chair with headphones on. The barber asked the blonde to take off her headphones, she replied, "No, I ca... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-headphones/704/ Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if h... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-pill/312/ Q. What is the difference between school dinners and a pile of slugs? A. School dinners come on a plate!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/school-dinners-vs-a-pile-of-slugs/2385/ Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? A. Run like hell, because she has a grenade in her mouth!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-throwing-a-pin/725/ Satan was complaining bitterly to God, "You made the world so that it was not fair, and you made it so that most people would have to strugg... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/why-god-created-lawyers/1358/ One morning this blonde calls her friend and says, "Please come over and help me. I have this killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/killer-jigsaw-puzzle/599/ For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren. She had even produced a plastic fol... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/pround-grandmother/2755/ There were eleven people hanging on to a rope that came down from an airplane. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette. They all decided tha... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/brave-brunette/3465/ A burglary was recently committed at West Ham's ground and the entire contents of the trophy room were stolen. The police are looking for a ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/west-ham-burglary/2139/ Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? A: Bigfoot has been spotted.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/smart-blonde-v-bigfoot/819/ Some boy scouts from the city were on a camping trip. The mosquitoes were so fierce, the boys had to hide under their blankets to avoid bein... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/surrender/137/ Q: What do you call a blonde in a swimming pool? A: An air bubble!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-in-a-swimming-pool/863/ Nugent needed legal advice, so he walked into the office of Gregory, Ellis and Gregory. Nugent sat down at the desk of the senior member of ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/gregory-ellis-and-gregory/1336/ A man walked into a store and saw a blonde staring at a orange juice carton. When he went to pay for his goods he was laughing hystericall... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/juiced-up-blonde/644/ Q. What jumps up and down in front of a car? A. Froglights!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-jumps-up-and-down-in-front-of-a-car/2338/ Yo Mama so poor, I saw her kicking a can down the street, so I asked her what she was doing and she said, "Moving!"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/moving-joke/3268/ A policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but was not getting many. Then, he discovered the problem; a 10 year old boy was stand... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/speed-trap/1680/ A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis, the man as... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/honey/4706/ A man takes his hamster to the vet, and after a short look at the creature the vet pronounces it dead. Not happy with the vet's diagnosis th... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dead-hamster/21/ Yo Momma is so stupid she jumped over a glass wall to see what was on the other side!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/glass-wall/3218/ An attractive woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Texas when her car broke down. An Indian on horseback came along and ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yahoo/5125/ An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about her then-four-year-old daughter. On the way to preschool, the doctor had le... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-stethoscope/118/ An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman were without tickets for the opening ceremonies of the summer Olympics but hoped to be able to tal... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/opening-ceremonies/2934/ Following a car accident, a Police officer questions a Blonde about the accident. Policeman asks, "What gear were you in at the moment of... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-gear/869/ A young associate was romantically ambushed in a darkened room of the law firm. After months of the social isolation that comes from eighty ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/romantic-ambush/5065/ After being away on business for a week before Christmas, Tom thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift. "How about some p... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/cheap-husband/2833/ Q. How do you know your kitchen floor is dirty? A. The slugs leave a trail on the floor that reads, "clean me!"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dirty-kitchen-floor/2383/ From Harper's Magazine: "Amount of pizza eaten each day in U.S. (acres): 75."... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-us-and-pizza/1743/ Q: Why don't blondes eat Jelly? A: They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/jelly/691/ Did you hear about the fellow that was talking to his buddy, and he said, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everyt... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/great-sex-certificate/4168/ Two storks are sitting in their nest: a father stork and baby stork. The baby stork is crying and crying and father stork is trying to calm ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/baby-stork/5135/ This is an apparently true story from Kalamazoo Gazette, titled 'Man Killed Repairing Truck' from 1995. James Burns, 34, of Alamo, Mich.,... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/troubling-noise/2734/ Lady Luck was seldom kind to Sam. Although Sam had a real zest for life he was constantly beset by bad luck. He loved poker but poker did no... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/unlucky-sam/465/ I went to the store the other day, I was only in there for about five minutes and when I came out there was a damn motorcycle cop writing a... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/parking-tickets/4477/ Q. Why did the mosquito go to the dentist? A. To improve his bite!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/why-did-the-mosquito-go-to-the-dentist/2279/ Two guys are moving about in a supermarket when their carts collide. One says to the other, "Excuse me, but I'm looking for my wife." ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/when-carts-collide/3630/ Two little squirrels were walking along in the forest. The first one spied a nut and cried out, "Oh, look! A nut!" The second squirrel jumpe... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/two-squirrels-one-nut/1288/ Yo Mama so fat I was in bed with her rolled over twice and I was still on her.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/in-bed-with-yo-mama/5363/ Q. Why did the duck quack? A. Because a fish was nibbling his bottom.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/ducks/5364/ After a young couple brought their new baby home, the wife suggested that her husband should try his hand at changing nappies. "I'm busy," h... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/next-nappy/4155/ There were these three men that walked into a bar. The first one said, "Can I have a fork?" So the barman gave him a fork. The second one ca... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/sidewalk/3150/ Q. What kind of pole is short and floppy? A. A tadpole!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-kind-of-pole-is-short-and-floppy/2369/ A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blond behind the ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/pull-over/629/ Q. What kind of doctors are like spiders? A. Spin doctors!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-kind-of-doctors-are-like-spiders/2395/ A blonde walked in a diner and orders a cup of coffee. When she gets her drink, she notices that it has a "contest game piece" on the side... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/i-won-a-motor-home/837/ It was many years ago since the embarrassing day when a young woman, with a baby in her arms, entered his butcher shop and confronted him wi... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/free-meat/3074/ Q. What do worms leave around their baths? A. The scum of the earth!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-do-worms-leave-around-their-baths/2410/ A man lay spread out over three seats in the second row of a movie theatre. As he lay there moaning and breathing heavily, an usher came... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/very-rude-man/3447/ The policeman arrived at the scene of an accident to find that a car had struck a telephone pole. Searching for witnesses, he discovered a p... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-witness/1691/ A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. Th... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/swinging-dog/4590/ Q. How do mice celebrate when they move home? A. With a mouse warming party!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/how-do-mice-celebrate/2315/ A cop stops a man for running a stop sign and the subject gives the cop a lot of grief explaining that he did stop. After several minutes... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/stop-or-just-slow-down/1644/ Q: Why, on average, is the IQ so high in Japan? A: Have you ever seen a Japanese blonde?... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/high-iq-in-japan/763/ A guy comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and finds a stranger having sex with his wife. He says, "What the hell are you two doing... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/stupid-husband/200/ Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer? A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/difference-between-a-blonde-and-a-computer/768/ On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/wheres-the-wife/1627/ Q. How do frogs communicate? A. Morse Toad!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/how-do-frogs-communicate/3380/ A blonde woman is walking down the street with her blouse open. A cop is approaching from about a block away, thinking, "Boy, my eyes must b... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/indecent-exposure/5218/ A blonde was filling out her job application. When it asked for 'Education' she wrote 'Hooked on Phonics'.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/education/856/ Knock Knock! Who's there? Boo! Boo who? Don't cry. It's only a joke!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/boo-who/3098/ There is a story about a monastery in Europe perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/how-often-they-changed-the-rope/3062/ Q. What's a mouse's favourite record? A. Please cheese me!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/a-mouses-favorite-record/2313/ This is apparently a true story from the 10th of February, 1993. Dennis Payne, 30, was arrested as a pickpocket at a Jersey City, N.J., t... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/paynes-arrest-record/2065/ A man walks into a bar. He sees a good looking, smartly dressed woman perched on a bar stool. He walks up behind her and says: "Hi there goo... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/ill-screw-anybody/33/ A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says, "You can't drive around wit... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/truck-full-of-penguins/18/ Q. How do you know if you have a tough mosquito? A. You slap him and he slaps you back!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/tough-mosquito/2270/ A guy comes home from the bar drunk one night around 3 in the morning. His wife is sleeping and he is trying to sneak into bed. He's laying ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/touchdown/4779/ You might be a lawyer if... * You are charging someone for reading these jokes. * The shortest sentence you have ever written was mor... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/are-you-a-lawyer/1361/ As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex the husband puts his pocket change into a china piggy... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/piggy-bank/198/ A student was heading home for the holidays. When she got to the airline counter, she presented her ticket to New York. And as she gave the ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/luggage/3521/ An Army brat was boasting about his father to a Navy brat. "My dad is an engineer. He can do everything. Do you know the Alps?" "Yes,"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-army-and-navy-brats/558/ Q. Why did Mickey Mouse go to space? A. To visit Pluto!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/why-did-mickey-mouse-go-to-space/115/ A woman golfer suffers a nasty bee sting and leaves the course to go see her doctor about it. "What happened?" asked the doctor. "I go... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/nasty-bee-sting/4497/ A pair of Essex robbers entered a record shop nervously waving guns. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the start... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/essex-robbers/2746/ You know what I hate about midgets. They always have their nose in my business!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/midgets/5360/ A patient walks into a doctor's office. Patient: "Doctor, people ignore me." Doctor: "Next!"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/ignorant-people/1247/ One day a blonde woman noticed her house was on fire. In a panic she called the Fire Department. When the fireman answered, she yelled,... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/house-on-fire/652/ A man walking down the street noticed a small boy trying to reach the doorbell of a house. Even when he jumped up, he couldn't quite reach i... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/push-the-doorbell/113/ A young lad was visiting a church for the first time, checking all the announcements and posters along the walls. When he came to a group... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dumbfounded-youngster/3013/ A crook thought maybe he could rob a church. The crook takes the money but notices a priest. The crook wants to kill the only witness, so he... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-crook-and-the-priest/4607/ A man is in a bar and has one too many drinks. This beautiful lady sits down next to him. He turns to her and says, "Hey how 'bout it. You a... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/a-man-and-a-beautiful-lady/30/ When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "W... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/bean-soup/1728/ Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, "Your grandma's ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/your-grandma/3452/ A young man was walking into town one day when a wood hauler gave him a ride. After traveling about a mile or two, the truck was stopped ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/wood-hauler/1692/ Liam had left Dublin to go up to Belfast for a bit of skydiving, Late Sunday evening he was found in tree by a farmer. "What happened?" s... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/ask-the-locals/2895/ Q. What is small, furry and smells like bacon? A. Hamster!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-is-small-furry-and-smells-like-bacon/2304/ Yo Mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued!"... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-on-the-scale/3263/ A blonde who is desperate for money kidnaps a child, pins a ransom note on his shirt demanding that £10,000 be placed in a trash can at th... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/from-a-blonde/683/ A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Va... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/pearl-necklace-dream/2846/ A popular bar had a new robotic bartender installed. A guy came in for a drink and the robot asked him, "What's your IQ?" The man replied, "... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/robotic-bartender/32/ A man jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on his back. As he's falling, he realizes his chute is broken. He doesn't know anything abou... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/broken-parachute/1379/ Q: What is a blondes favorite radio station? A: Scan.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/a-blondes-favorite-radio-station/894/ Two would-be fishermen rented a boat, and one caught a large fish. "We should mark the spot," he said. The other man drew a large X in... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/two-would-be-fishermen/499/ During late spring one year, a blonde was trying out her new boat. She was unable to have her boat perform, travel through water, or do any ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-blonde-and-the-boat/1196/ One night a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a fellow tumble out... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/drunken-fellow/26/ A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/a-neutron-walks-into-a-bar/1141/ A woman walks into a bar with her five pound Chihuahua and sits down next to this guy, whom she notices is feeling a little bit queasy. A fe... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/dog-food/29/ A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/materialistic-lawyer/1686/ Yo Momma so dumb she put lipstick on her head just to make up your mind.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-momma-and-lipstick/5359/ Q. Where do frogs leave their hats and coats? A. In the croakroom!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/where-do-frogs-leave-their-hats-and-coats/2377/ A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, we... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/tap-tip/216/ Knock knock! Who's there? Who. Who who? Is there an owl in here?... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/who/3101/ "Excuse me, could you tell me the time?" asked the blonde of a man on the street corner. "Sure, it's three fifteen," he replied with a smil... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-time/733/ Doctor: "Nurse, how is that little girl doing who swallowed ten quarters last night?" Nurse: "No change yet."... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/ill-little-girl/1235/ A little girl was in church with her mother when she started feeling ill. "Mommy," she said, "can we leave now?" "No," her mother replied.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/sick-girl/131/ An apparently true story from the 1st of February, 1993. James MacDonald and William Shoesmith, both 26, were sentenced to five years in ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/drunk-robbers/1009/ Q. What is gray, hairy and lives on a man's face? A. A mouse-tache!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/mouse-jooke/2309/ This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-blonde-and-the-blinker/649/ A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife. "You just won't believe what happ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/two-guys-down-by-the-canal/1603/ Yo Mama is so stupid she tripped over a cordless phone.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-and-the-cordless-phone/3137/ A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the other end. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goe... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/i-wont-sleep-with-you-tonight/28/ Q. What's the difference between a man and a government bond? A. Bonds mature.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/man-vs-government-bond/1/ Q. Where do bees go to the toilet? A. BP station!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/bee-toilet/3275/ Knock, Knock! Who's there? Mountain! Mountain who? Mountain dew!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/knock-knock-mountain/3176/ A psychologist is at a party talking with a small group of people, when a man comes up behind him and taps him on the shoulder. The psycholo... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/a-psychologist-is-at-a-party/4115/ Two statisticians were travelling in an airplane from LA to New York. About an hour into the flight, the pilot announced that they had lost ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/worries-while-flying/2460/ A man that was drinking all day goes into a bar. He demands a beer and is denied. Yet he keeps asking the bartender. Finally the bartender g... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/im-jesus-christ/275/ Yo Mama is so fat that when she goes down the stairs, everyone thinks Eastenders is coming on!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-going-down-the-stairs/3226/ Superman was flying when he saw Wonder Woman laying naked. So he thought: "What the hell, I'm faster than a bullet, so I'll fly in an take c... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/super-time/3242/ Q: How does a man show that he is planning for the future? A: He buys two cases of beer.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/planning-for-the-future/2/ A true story from February 17th, 1993. Fort Erie, Ontario, Constable Paul Fletcher told reporters in December that a man armed with a clu... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-getaway/2066/ As we stood in formation at the Pensacola Naval Air Station, our Flight Instructor said, "All right! All you dummies fall out." As the r... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/all-you-dummies-fall-out/524/ Q. What's grey and can't see well from either side? A. A donkey with its eyes shut.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/donkey-joke/3249/ "How come you're late?" asks the bartender as the blonde waitress walks in the door. "It was awful," she explains. "I was walking down ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/the-late-blonde/648/ The Smith's were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower and the family included Senators and ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/well-executed-story/7/ A man was caught for speeding and went before the judge. The judge said, "What will you take... 30 days or $30." The man replied, "I t... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-will-you-take/1633/ A man went to a pet shop and bought a talking parrot. He took the parrot home, and tried to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but in... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/swearing-parrot/300/ Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on en... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/vice-president-of-peas/1446/ Q. What is a grasshopper? A. An insect on a pogo stick!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/what-is-a-grasshopper/2257/ Man says to God: "Why did you make woman so beautiful?" God says: "So you would love her." Man says to God: "But God, why did you mak... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/man-says-to-god/2550/ Yo Mama is so dumb, she climbed over an invisible wall to see what was on the other side!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-and-the-invisible-wall/3309/ Why do blonde nurses always bring a red marker to work? To draw blood!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/blonde-nurses/3177/ A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde robbed a supermarket. As they were stealing, a police officer walked in the store and saw what was happe... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/three-women-rob-a-supermarket/1227/ A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/secret-for-a-long-happy-life/2673/ A police officer attempts to stop a car for speeding and the guy gradually increases his speed until he's topping 100 mph. He eventually rea... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/speeding-car/1617/ Two tourists were driving through Louisiana. As they were approaching Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the t... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/natchitoches/4650/ This is the story of four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was ask... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/everybody-somebody-anybody-and-nobody/1435/ It was about a month ago when a man in Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so went to his priest: "Forgive me Father, for I have si... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/forgive-me-father-for-i-have-sinned/3016/ Yo Mama is so fat when she went to the sea, the tsunami came out!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/yo-mama-and-the-tsunami/3230/ Two Yuppettes were shopping. When they started to discuss their home lives, one said, "Seems like all Alfred and I do anymore is fight. I've... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/all-we-do-is-fight/3076/ A country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so far out, there was no electricity. 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I never would've tho... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/any-foolish-thing/5344/ Q: What are the best ten years of an Irishman's life? A: Third grade.... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/best-ten-years-of-an-irishmans-life/5355/ Two men, sentenced to die in the electric chair on the same day were led down to the room in which they would meet their maker. The priest h... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/last-request/1641/ A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog's cross eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a ... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/cross-eyes-rotweiler/5191/ What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant? Very big worm holes in your garden!... http://www.reallyfunnyjokes.co.uk/joke/elephant-worm/2411/ A motorist, driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. 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